Sometimes people cross paths in ways that stay with them forever, even long after the moment that brought them together. For Tim Swinburn and Clare Brixey, that moment happened 20 years ago, and it began with tragedy. Back in 2004, Swinburn, who worked with Wiltshire Police at the time, had to knock on Brixey’s door to deliver the news no parent wants to hear. Her 20-year-old son, Ashley, had died in a car crash.
What Swinburn didn’t know then was that Brixey was already fighting her own battle. She was living with kidney failure and depended on dialysis to get through each week. Even after the accident, the two stayed in touch, forming a friendship that quietly grew over the years. When Swinburn later learned that Brixey’s previous kidney transplant was failing, he didn’t hesitate. He offered her his own.
“Giving the gift of life, to me it’s just a human thing to do,” he said. “Anyone with a heart would give something to keep someone else alive.”
The transplant took place in October at Southmead Hospital in Bristol. Surgeons completed the procedure in four hours, and both recovered well. Swinburn is already back at work, now in his role as a support worker at The Salvation Army’s Swindon Booth House. Brixey has been able to do something she hasn’t done in years: she went horse riding again.
She has nothing but gratitude for the friend who changed her life not once, but twice. Calling him a “man in a million,” Brixey reflected on how their connection began. “He was my family liaison officer; the person who knocked on my door to tell me my son had been killed in a road traffic collision,” she said. “He was such a compassionate man and very easy to talk to and supportive to our family.”
Their friendship lasted through two decades of highs and lows. “We just seemed to gel and we’ve been friends for 21 years,” she said. “He’s been here to support me and I’ve been there to support him. When my first kidney transplant started to fail, he told me ‘you’re going to have one of mine and I won’t take no as an answer.’”
Swinburn feels the same way. “Clare is one of those special people, we’ve joked over the years we are like siblings,” he said. “She is an amazing friend. Over my life I’ve had my ups and downs and she’s been there for me, and vice versa.”
For him, the reward is seeing her living again. “To know she is out there riding her horse again, to see her out there with her grand-daughter and daughter, that’s the reason I did it,” he said.
Both are now planning fundraisers for transplant-related charities in the hopes of helping others who face the same fight.