Womenz Magazine

Michelle Obama explains why she is open about her marriage struggles and describes how she raised her kids


Former first lady Michelle Obama has been candid about her marital difficulties, admitting last year that for nearly ten years while their two children were little, she “couldn’t stand” her husband, former President Barack Obama.

As she said on “CBS Mornings” on Thursday, she shares these details “because marriage is hard.”

And many young people give up on marriage for issues that are inherent in the relationship, she said. “Our marriage has lasted 30 years. I would gladly accept those odds if we had a terrific 20 years and only had 10 disagreements.

She said that at a time when being married is romanticized and “more about the dress,” successful married individuals must be forthright about the truth that getting married requires compromise, which “ain’t always fun.”

She said that including children made things more difficult. She jokingly said, “Don’t add kids to the mix, since they really screw up your life.

Malia, 24, and Sasha, 21, were raised by the Obamas collectively, even when they were residing in the White House. The daughters, according to Michelle Obama, are “way more blessed” than she and the former president ever were, and she wants them to know how to express appreciation.

Obama said she had to learn how to parent “with more” since she wants her girls to be independent as well as kind and understanding. She also wanted children to understand that it is up to them to be happy and that “neither the world nor anyone else owes them anything.”

“Control happens when you know how to create your own joy,” she remarked. “You know how to make yourself happy.” That entails limitations, prerequisites, accountability, and “handing them their lives early.” She said that she had worked to overcome her fear of seeing them fail and to “sit in their failure.”

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